Pressure Doesn’t Change You. It Reveals You.
Anyone can act positive, uplifting, encouraging, when things are going well.
When revenue’s climbing and customers are flowing in, everyone’s high-fiving.
Even the grumps can manage a smile. And honestly, if someone’s still a pain in the ass when the sun is shining?
Get the eff out!
But being a great leader isn’t always about the good days.
It’s about the storm – what you do when shit goes sideways?
When sales are tanking. When the team’s unraveling.
When you’re panicked and short on answers.
That’s when people start watching you differently – and pressure becomes a reveal.
Bring the ruckus
Over the years — building teams, reporting to execs, running my own stuff — I’ve learned a few rules that help me lead when things get tense.
This isn’t meant to sound buzzy – they’re the actual things I do when the things get tough.
1. Calm is contagious – so is panic.
Don’t get me wrong – I’m not about sugar-coating, or pretending. If something is going wrong, you need to express what’s wrong, and articulate the impact. That goes without saying.
But in a high-stakes moment, the team doesn’t just follow your words, they mirror your:
- Tone
- Body language
- Facial expression
- Emotional state
Your job in the initial moment after something has gone wrong isn’t necessarily to fix the problem – it’s to steady the room.
Freak out privately if you have to — but externally, chill the eff out. Regulate your face, your tone, your energy.
Nobody wants to see the leader freaking out or spiraling.
People can’t help solve problems if they’re in panic mode. Your job is to lower the collective blood pressure so the team can start thinking clearly again.
Get familiar – if you’re going to be a founder or a CEO or just a general leader, with the discipline of controlling your affect under stress.
2. Know the Line Between Decision and Consensus.
When pressure hits, most CEOs either:
A) Turn into a crazy dictator, OR
B) Turn things into a group therapy session
Neither are great options.
But really seasoned leaders know when to ask for input — and when to protect others from the weight of the decision.
Sometimes you have to pull people in, and sometimes you spare them.
3. Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good.
It’s crunch time, shit is literally hitting the fan – if you’re in a crucial situation, now is not the time to try and find perfection.
I can’t stand it when people want to over-analyze and try and reach not only consensus, but a solution without downsides. It often doesn’t exist.
A lot of times, the options all suck:
- There isn’t an ideal path forward
- The job is to pick the least bad one, and move
Make a call, own it, and keep trucking.
How It Looked in Real Life: March 28, 2023
That was the day that we publicly launched Hampton (the company where I was previously CEO), after being in stealth for about 9 months.
Demand-wise, I thought I had a handle on what to expect. Maybe 500, 1,000 leads, tops.
I was wrong.
By 9AM, we had over 5,000+ qualified applications (for context, those numbers are bonkers).
- Application intake was full
- Sales calendars were jammed
- No waitlist, no fallback page, no comms
- Pure chaos
It sounds amazing — except our systems weren’t built for that.
By noon:
The team was panicked — and we were remote, so there was no “everyone in the war room” moment. We had to respond in real time, across time zones, with limited tools.
I made sure I stayed true to myself:
- Stayed calm, didn’t over-react, didn’t do a “WTF is happening??”, pointing fingers.
- We diagnosed the problem, pulled the right people into zoom – not everyone.
- I took ownership. “My oversight. I should have anticipated this”.
- Cracked a joke. Smiled. Reminded everyone this was a good problem. Keep rolling.
We didn’t fix everything in an hour.
But we turned down the panic, got aligned, and started moving forward.
That’s the job.
Summing it up
When I was younger?
I’d get hot. Red in the face. Sharp. Reactive.
I got things done — but probably made everyone around me anxious in the process.
Now?
I’m calmer. Clearer.
Still urgent AF — just not panicked.
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